Β ο»ΏSurviving with a newborn and a toddler… one month on

I still can’t get my head around the fact that I’m a mum to two little humans, and I can’t believe we have survived a month already. Suprisingly I am coping pretty well with a 20 month old and a newborn and here is how…

  1. Going to bed early! As a first time mum everyone tells you to ‘sleep when your baby sleeps’ which is simply not possible when you have an active toddler who only naps for an hour a day! So the only way I’m coping with the 2-3 hourly night feeds is by going to bed super early. My toddler sleeps by 7/7.30pm, I then do a few chores and take my baby upstairs and we’re both asleep by 9pm! This helps with the 5/6am starts. Such a glamorous life I lead πŸ˜‚
  2. A good routine. This goes with the above but basically having set nap times and a bedtime for my biggest monkey means I can semi plan the day and I know when to grab some lunch or start with dinner. I’m hoping to eventually have both boys in bed at the same time so I can get a couple of hours to myself. Maybe wishful thinking right now though.
  3. Doing grocery shopping online. I’m pre planning all my meals and ordering food online and getting it delivered as I just don’t have the time to go and do a food shop. I try and cook and prep dinner when my toddler is napping at lunch. I’m very fortunate to have my mum and sister nearby so one of them is usually here in the afternoon so as long as the baby is asleep they can entertain my toddler while I cook.
  4. Organising everything the night before. Once we come downstairs in the morning, it’s hard to just pop back upstairs to grab something as I don’t want to leave my monkey around the baby as anything could happen. Every evening I make sure we have enough nappy change essentials and spare clothes downstairs for the next day.
  5. Getting out of the house.Β This one is easier said than done. Firstly it’s winter so taking a newborn out requires more effort. And secondly getting out of the house with two takes longer than you would expect. But now we have all car seats and pushchairs set up, it should get easier. I’m finding it a lot easier to entertain my biggest boy out of the house, as he was getting very bored of being cooped up inside. And my littlest mainly sleeps while out and only feeds every 2-3 hours so this gives me time to focus on my oldest when out and about.. (Sami used to feed up to three times an hour which made going out when he was a newborn somewhat more challenging). Now the weather is nicer I plan to go out at least once a day, even if it’s just a walk around the block. We will also be taking advantage of our lovely garden.
  6. Strong support network. As I just mentioned my mum and sister live round the corner and help me daily. I am very lucky! As I’m breastfeeding there’s not much they can do to help with the baby but they help to entertain my toddler, by taking him out, feeding him, and helping with bath and bedtimes! I also have a very tight knit extended family who are nearby so have had lots of meals sent from aunties and cousins… I am very lucky I know and not everybody has their family nearby.
  7. Lowering my standards (and expectations).Β This one is an important one… I’m slowly accepting that my house will not be as immaculate as I would like. Things may be untidy and out of place, the laundry may pile up for a few days longer than I’d like, some days my toddler (and me) will stay in pjs all day and some days my toddler may watch nursery rhymes on TV for longer than he should. We may eat take out more then we should, some days my toddler will have weetabix for dinner… but it’s okay! Sometimes we put too much pressure on ourselves and there’s no need. Don’t get me wrong, whenever I get a chance I am doing housework, or cooking, or trying to do worthwhile activities with my toddler, but some days nothing gets done and the world is not going to end!

My post baby ‘coming home’ wish list..Β 

Last time I gave birth we were so focused on getting the house and everything ready for the babies arrival,  I didn’t think much about after the labour and coming home! 

So, this time I have put together a short wish list of things I’d like to come home to.. My husband is more than likely never going to read this, so I’ll be relying on my wonderful sister to pass the message on πŸ™‚ 

So here is what I’d like to come home to: 

  1. A freshly made bed.. preferably with the pregnancy pillow washed and hidden away somewhere, I’m so fed up of it I don’t want to see it for a LONG time. 
  2. A fully stocked fridge/ snack cupboard.. if I remember right I had no real appetite last time but snacked on a lot of fruit. Some nice refreshing drinks would be nice too πŸ‘πŸΌ
  3. A clean and tidy house 
  4. A gift! Preferably diamonds or sapphires πŸ˜‹.. last time I hinted and hinted to my husband for a gift and got absolutely zilch! Not even flowers, a card or chocolates. Luckily my wonderful sister and cousin L spoilt me rotten with beautiful jewellery. 
  5. My monkey.. and this is the most important one. Hoping to come home to a happy, well fed, and well slept little monkey. It’s the first time he will be left without me so I am quite anxious about this! 

    That’s one small step for man.. one giant leap for our household..

    Something I’ve not really written about (and it’s not been intentional I’ve just been too busy to update and write about everything I’ve wanted to in the last few months) is my little monkeys slow progress when it comes to walking. 

    I’m so fed up of hearing the words.. “is he walking yet”.. people ask in such a way that you feel like you’re failing as a parent, not that something like walking is a reflection of you as parents or even signifies any kind of intelligence or developmental ability of your child. All babies walk eventually! It’s a question that I find so annoying but often respond with, “No, but he makes up for it when it comes to talking”. And that response is me being defensive, like I have something to prove.. stupid I know! 

    Well anyway, I’ve spent my ENTIRE pregnancy carrying a toddler around as my monkey has had no interest in walking whatsoever. So it’s just typical that as I reach 37 weeks pregnant, Sami has decided to walk! And it’s so lovely to see, and he’s so proud of himself! He still needs to gain some confidence and get a better balance but he’s loving walking around the house taking lots and lots of steps, we will have a pro walker in no time! If you ask me I’ve had it easy for 19 months as I can see how life is going to get so much harder with an active toddler and a baby πŸ˜‚. 

    I have had some concerns with his feet as he doesn’t lay them flat and we have waited months and months for an appointment with a specialist, only for an appointment date to finally come.. on my due date! Typical! I guess this is just the first of many situations where we are going to have conflicting priorities with Sami and the new baby, and I’m sure we will find a way to make it all work.. or maybe that’s just the optimist in me. I’ll have to let you know in a few months time πŸ™‚ 

    So anyway, all you mums out there who are feeling rubbish because your baby doesn’t walk, or crawl, or sit, or talk, or eat, or god forbid sleep through the night yet.. they will when they are ready (so cliched I know but also so true). Sometimes we just need to take a step back, put things into perspective and ignore negatively from others… 

    I have no actual photos of him walking yet..

    Pregnancy and Sugary drinks!Β 

    So I’m sat in the hospital waiting room having just had my blood test and a sugary drink. I now have to sit and wait for a minimum of TWO hours with a room full of pregnant women (eyeing up each other’s bumps), Jeremy Kyle and a rowdy child πŸ˜‚.. oh and I can’t eat or drink.. I’m pretty sure I’d rather be at work. 

    I came prepared with my iPad, my work blackberry, a book and some nail varnish hoping to catch up on some blog posts and finally paint my nails. But I think I’ll save that for an hours time when I’m super bored. 

    I was nearly that lady with the rowdy toddler..We got to nursery as normal this morning but when I took my monkey out of the car he was covered in sick. Uh oh, he caught the bug. I had it last week, then passed it on to my mum, who passed it on to my sister. So already late for my glucose test, with all of my babysitters out of action I was preparing myself for three hours of mayhem, trying to look after a sick toddler in a small confined and uncomfy setting. Thank god for daddy, he dropped me to the hospital just in time and took my sick monkey home. 

    So back to plan A with my iPad, my book, nail varnish and phones, just wishing I could have a cup of tea and a chocolate too, and a comfy chair! It’s bizarre how things change from hospital to hospital and antenatal care. For my last pregnancy I was living in London until I was 36 weeks pregnant, and my antenatal care was at Chelsea & Westminster. Appointments were super super quick, we were in an out within an hour. It takes Birmingham Women’s 5 hours + to fit in exactly the same checks, scans and tests. It’s so frustrating I come home hating the world after every appointment. 

    And the glucose test is no different, today I’ve had to come in first thing, have a blood test and a sugary drink, and then I have to sit here for potentially over two hours before having another blood test. In London I was given a drink prior to my appointment which I had to drink an hour before, followed by a blood test. And that was it! 

    Although it wasn’t that simple.. I puked up the lucozade on the way to the hospital (bear in mind I hadn’t eaten since the night before), so I arrived at the hospital stinking of sick and was made to drink another bottle (which I  also nearly puked) and wait another hour before having my blood test. Just as I got home, I got a call from the hospital saying they hadn’t taken my blood properly and could I come back, to say I was unimpressed was an understatement πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚.. 

    I just don’t think I have much luck with glucose tests, and the sugary drinks are so yucky when your already nauseous and haven’t eaten since the night before..it’s like a pregnant women’s worse nightmare.. wish me luck that today goes better.. 

    Sami’s going to be a big brother..Β 

    I’ve been super duper busy with our summer holiday, then starting back to work and my little monkey starting nursery, that I forgot to tell you all.. Sami is going to be a big brother πŸ™‚ 

    Baby number two is due February 2017, which makes me 24 weeks pregnant. And OMG I cannot believe how big my bump is this time compared to last. I’m humongous. I got asked if I needed help carrying my shopping to my car yesterday, something that never happened at all in my last pregnancy.. I look like I’m ready to pop. 

    My pregnancy has been relatively smooth like last time and to be honest you don’t have time to even think about being pregnant second time.. except for the huge bump which is keeping me up at night already. 

    They’ll be a 20 month gap between Sami and his little brother or sister and we’re so excited to meet our new addition..